Back handed compliments really aren't bad all the time

I have read SO many posts on the subject of "other people's reactions" to our kids and their exceptionalities. I think that MOST people are inherently good, and aren't purposely setting out to anger us when they say" but he looks so normal" in response to learning our kids have special needs. That is a compliment. Take it as such. When someone says that to me I want to scream Hallelujah from the roof tops. I respond to anyone who makes that comment "Thank you so much, that is the nicest thing someone has said to me all day." If that person isparticularly chatty, I may even say something like "we had a difficult childbirth and it is a miracle either one of us is still alive. In fact, 30years ago we would have died in childbirth. He has severe brain damage and he shouldn't even be walking, so the fact that a complete stranger looks at him and thinks he is doing so well that he looks "normal" really gives me a little boost to make it thru another day, week, month." Now, that complete stranger that had absolutely NO experience with a disabled child has alot more sympathy and compassion for everything we do. If my son looked syndromy, then nobody would even try to converse. Most people are terrified of obviously disabled people, especially children. It is so far out of their comfort zones. So what if my son doesn't meet developmental milestones in a timely manner. Big deal. At least when he is older, he will be able to live a relatively normal life, not be judged byhis looks and have a much better chance of being accepted by mainstreamed kids, hopefully.